From Baggage to Breakthrough: How to Let Go of Toxic Beliefs 🧠
A Step-by-Step Guide to Uncovering—and Releasing—What’s Been Holding You Back. (9min Read)
TL;DR Summary:
Beliefs are mental shortcuts that shape how we perceive the world, impacting our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.
Cognitive distortions (deletions, distortions, and generalizations) are how our brain filters sensory input, sometimes leading to limiting beliefs or baggage.
Beliefs can become deeply ingrained and influence our outcomes through the Belief Wheel, which links beliefs to thoughts, feelings, and actions.
Limiting beliefs can be identified and released using methods like Internal Family Systems (IFS), where we connect with the "Parts" of ourselves holding onto these beliefs.
You have the power to shift old, limiting beliefs and adopt new, empowering ones, changing your life outcomes in the process.
Beliefs
Today we will be covering beliefs. This is one of my favorite topics to write about and talk about!
A wise man named Henry Ford once said, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t you are right.” And boy was he correct.
Beliefs are huge drivers of our overall life outcomes. They can cause us to self-sabotage and even drive our negative thinking itself.
First, let's talk about what a belief is specifically.
Scientifically, a belief is defined as:
“A conviction of truth without its verification, meaning it is a subjective mental interpretation created from our own perceptions, reasoning, or communication.”
This is a little hard to digest, so you can think of beliefs kind of like thinking habits.
They are not just simply thoughts and ideas, they’re deeper.
For example, murder is wrong. You don’t even have to think about it, you just know it to be true, almost hypnotically.
Core beliefs or values like this are at the deepest level of our programming.
Why Are Beliefs Important?
As our brain was growing up evolutionarily, it became more important for our survival for it to be able to predict its environment faster and faster!
To do this, it had to learn to take shortcuts to keep us alive while at the same time-saving energy for higher-level cognitive processing.
Beliefs are these time and energy-saving shortcuts.
They allow us to distill the millions of bits of sensory information hitting our sensory organs per second and “jump to conclusions” quicker.
Since our brain is in a dark skull, it needs this sensory information to make sense of the world, and to keep us alive!
We are subconsciously getting bombarded with about 11 million bits of sensory information per second from our eyes, ears, nose, skin, pain receptors, and SO MUCH more.
Consciously, however, we can only process about 50 bits of this information at a time.
So, where does the rest of this information go?!
3 broad things happen to it, Deletions, Distortions, and Generalizations.
These are called Cognitive Distortions, and as we grow up, our brain is filtering our reality subconsciously using these 3 methods all the time.
Cognitive Distortions
In psychology, cognitive distortions are patterns of thinking that cause individuals to perceive reality inaccurately.
These distortions can lead to negative emotions and behaviors, and they are commonly addressed in therapeutic models like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT).
Three common types of cognitive distortions include deletion, distortion, and generalization.
Deletion
Deletion happens when we selectively pay attention to a certain part of an experience and not others.
For example, as you’re reading this, you’re deleting the feeling of your clothes on your body.
Now that I’ve said something, your conscious focus has shifted to that 50 bits of sensory information.
This can happen in more abstract ways as well, like if you believe no one likes you, this brings your conscious focus to the 50 bits of info that prove to you that no one likes you, and deletes all of the people who do like you. Ouch!
Distortions
Distortion involves misinterpreting sensory input, leading to an inaccurate understanding of reality.
For instance, if you're walking in the forest and think you see a snake, only to realize it’s a stick, your brain has distorted the information.
While distortions like this can be adaptive—jumping away from a potential snake could save your life—these thought patterns can also lead to unnecessary anxiety or fear when applied in non-threatening situations.
Generalizations
And last is generalizations these are conclusions we draw based on only one or two experiences or events.
Think about touching a hot stove, how many times did you need to touch one before you realized you shouldn’t touch another? What about a hot grill or fire?
After getting burned by a stove that cooks food, you don’t have to also touch a grill or fire to figure out the same thing, your brain generalizes the 1 experience to the others!
All 3 of these Cognitive Distortions have helped us explode evolutionarily, but they can also get us in trouble at times by leading to implicit biases, cognitive dissonance, limiting beliefs, trauma, and a whole host of other things.
Our Internal Representation (IR)
As we grow up, our brain uses our senses, and these filtering mechanisms to create an Internal Representation (IR) of what's going on outside of our skull!
It’s constantly predicting what’s outside the skull, and checking it with its internal “guess” of what should be out there.
This constant guess and check system eventually develops into our self-concept or sense of self.
This process starts with external events coming in through our sensory organs as visual, sound, kinesthetic, gustatory, or olfactory bits of information.
They are then filtered by using the 3 cognitive distortions we just talked about, and finally, they are stored in our long-term memory in the neocortex to help us make sense of the world.
As we’re kids, the library of our long-term memory is pretty empty, but over time, it fills up with beliefs, values, past decisions/experiences, etc that we can use in the future.
This library of information becomes subconscious to us over time, but they are still there helping filter new sensory information all the time like in the picture above.
These filters act as a projector for our senses, which is what creates our internal representation of reality.
Behavior & Your Internal Representation
This internal representation is intertwined with our State and our Physiology which then determine our outward behaviors.
These 3 things all affect one another! For example, let’s use a bakery to demonstrate this.
Stop for a moment and think about what memories or associations you have in your mind about bakeries.
Some people have positive memories of fresh-baked cookies or bread.
If this is your Internal Representation of a bakery, walking into a bakery would put you into a good mood, and you’d become excited to eat some cookies!
This is how your Internal Representation affects your State Top-Down.
The positive memories stored in your long-term memory create positive emotions & actions around the bakery.
Sticking with this same example, imagine you had a pounding headache on the day you walk into the bakery. What would this do to your State?
Instead of a good mood and excitement, your state would change to one of pain, which could make you want to get out of there!
This is how your Body’s Physiology can affect your State Bottom-Up.
This battle between our Internal Representations in our mind & our Physiology in our body is going on all the time, and whichever is stronger is what determines our State, which then determines our actions/reactions!
I use the Belief Wheel to help anxious achievers understand this process in simpler terms, and how it creates our beliefs over time!
The Belief Wheel
The Belief Wheel is a conceptual tool I use to illustrate how our beliefs influence our thoughts, feelings, and actions in a cyclical manner.
While not a formally recognized psychological model, it is similar to the well-established cognitive triangle in cognitive-behavioral therapy, which highlights the interplay between thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.
The Belief Wheel process has 4 parts, which are Results, Beliefs, Feelings/Thoughts & Actions.
Imagine them in a circle like in the picture below.
Let’s pretend the result that you want is to lose weight. So say you have a conscious thought “I want to lose 25 lbs.”
However, as you go to achieve this, you get to the belief portion of the wheel, and subconsciously you have the belief that “I am not worthy enough to be healthy.”
Continuing around the wheel, this belief affects your thoughts negatively, making your mind focus on only the memories that prove to you that you aren’t worthy enough to be healthy.
These thoughts make you feel worthless, hopeless, etc.
These feelings cause you to avoid the actions you need to take to become healthy.
By not acting, you get the same result of not being healthy, which proves the belief that you’re not worthy correct, further reinforcing it in your subconscious, and the negative self-talk & self-sabotaging continue.
This can be a vicious cycle if you don’t know how to escape it.
This is how beliefs are programmed into us, and this cycle is constantly spinning.
Anything we see, hear or experience as a child can wire in a belief in this way.
Our environment is a huge factor in determining what types of things are wired in this way.
Whether that be trauma, growing up in the church, or having divorced parents, whatever it is that makes up your experiences has shaped your Internal Representations & beliefs through the Belief Wheel process.
These beliefs then shape our outcomes in life.
While the Belief Wheel is a personal adaptation to help visualize this process, the core idea is rooted in well-established psychological principles.
Understanding how beliefs shape our experiences is essential in identifying and breaking negative cycles that affect our mental and emotional well-being.
Baggage, When Beliefs Go Bad
Baggage is a term we use for beliefs that don’t serve you, sometimes called limiting beliefs.
As you now know, your Brain is always Generalizing, Distorting, and Deleting things.
These cognitive distortions are what can lead to baggage.
Imagine getting bullied growing up. To protect you in the future, a Part of you wired the belief that all people are mean into your brain.
This Part of you generalized the 3 or 4 bullies into a belief about all people and deleted the good people that exist out there distorting your Internal Representation which then influences your future behaviors.
Now, 20 years later you may have trouble making friends, trusting people, etc. This baggage is now getting in the way of the life you want to live, and needs to be released!
Alright, let’s talk about a quick and easy way to identify potential baggage in your life.
Releasing Baggage w/ IFS
One of the most effective ways to release limiting beliefs is through Internal Family Systems (IFS).
In IFS, we recognize that different "Parts" of ourselves hold different beliefs, often shaped by past experiences, trauma, or influential people in our lives.
Some of these beliefs may be outdated, distorted, or simply no longer serve us.
Here's how you can start releasing them today:
Find the Part: Close your eyes and focus on a limiting belief you have. Ask yourself, "What Part of me holds onto this belief?" You might notice a specific image, sensation, or feeling arise. This is the Part of you that’s been carrying this baggage.
Get Curious: Rather than trying to push the belief away, approach it with curiosity. Ask this Part, "Why do you hold this belief?" Often, our Parts believe they're protecting us in some way, even if the belief is no longer helpful. Maybe it was formed to keep you safe during childhood, or in response to a painful experience.
Show Compassion: Thank this Part for trying to help you. This may seem odd, but every Part has a positive intention. Even if it holds a limiting belief, it’s been trying to shield you from pain or disappointment. When you show compassion to this Part, you create space for healing.
Invite New Beliefs: Once the Part feels heard and understood, invite it to explore a new belief. Ask it, "What would it be like to believe something different?" For example, if your Part holds the belief "I am unlovable," suggest, "What if you believed I am worthy of love?"
Witness the Shift: Sit with the new belief and notice how the Part responds. When a Part feels safe and seen, it’s more willing to release old beliefs and embrace new, healthier ones. This shift may happen gradually, but with practice, your Parts will begin to adopt more empowering beliefs.
Obviously, it will take more than a 5 step process in a blog to shift your beliefs, but this is a great place to start!
As always, I highly recommend working with someone trained in IFS to help you work with these Parts of you, especially with trauma-based beliefs.
You Have the Power
Beliefs are powerful. They can either limit you or lift you.
But here's the key: you get to decide what to believe.
Your brain might be hardwired with old, outdated beliefs, but it can also be rewired with new, empowering ones.
You don’t have to be trapped by the beliefs you inherited or those programmed by past trauma.
You have the power to break free from the baggage that no longer serves you.
By doing the work, like the exercise above, you can change your internal representation of the world and, in turn, change your outcomes.
So, what belief are you letting go of today?
Take action, and watch how your world shifts in ways you never thought possible.
And until next time… Live Heroically! 🧠
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