The 95% Trap: Why Your Brain Won’t Let You Change 🧠
It’s not about discipline or motivation—it’s about identity. And your identity is just a prediction your brain made. (7min Read)
TL;DR Summary
95% of your thoughts today are the same as yesterday, which means your brain is reinforcing an identity—whether you like it or not.
Your subconscious acts like a thermostat, keeping you at a familiar "temperature" (identity), no matter how much willpower you use to change.
Dopamine rewards you for staying the same, which is why change feels so hard.
Your brain is a prediction engine—it doesn't know the difference between real and imagined identities.
The solution? Change the prediction. Instead of forcing behavior change, shift who your brain expects you to be.
This is how identity rewiring works—and why it's the key to effortless transformation.
The 95% Trap: Why Your Brain Keeps You Stuck
Did you know 95% of your thoughts today are the same ones you had yesterday?
That means you’re not just thinking—you’re reinforcing an identity.
And if that identity isn't helping you, it could be the very thing holding you back.
Your mind, brain, and body are in constant communication.
How you think changes how you feel, and how you feel changes the actions you take, which affect how you think.
It’s a feedback loop.
And if 95% of your thoughts are the same every day, then 95% of your feelings are, too.
This means... 95% of your actions are also the same.
And those patterns of thoughts, feelings, and actions?
They don’t just shape your life.
They become your identity.
Understanding how powerful your identity is, and how to change it, is one of the most powerful tools you can learn.
Lucky for you, that’s exactly what we’re talking about today!
Let’s dive in.
By 35, Your Identity Is on Autopilot
Neuroscientists have found that by age 35, most of your subconscious identity is so ingrained that it runs like muscle memory—just like walking.
Think about it: When was the last time you had to "decide" how to walk?
You don’t. Your brain predicts it automatically.
And the same thing happens with who you think you are.
By this point, your brain doesn’t need to consciously think about "you" anymore—it just runs the prediction based on past patterns.
It’s built a model in your brain, specifically in something called your neocortex, and it uses this model to predict your feelings, thoughts, and actions.
And because your brain is a prediction engine, it doesn’t just guess what you’ll do—it actively works to make sure you do it to confirm its prediction about your identity.
How Identity Drives Behavior
Psychologist and marketing expert Jonah Berger has spent years studying this phenomenon.
His research shows that identity-based motivation is one of the strongest forces in human behavior.
In one study, researchers found that when people were asked "Would you like to vote?", they were less likely to actually do it than those asked, "Would you like to be a voter?"
Why? Because actions are temporary, but identity is permanent.
When you define yourself as the kind of person who does something, it creates a self-reinforcing loop:
“I am a runner.” → You naturally run, because that's what runners do.
“I am a leader.” → You make decisions confidently, because that’s what leaders do.
“I am a lifelong learner.” → You seek out new knowledge, because that’s what lifelong learners do.
Your brain wants to act in alignment with your identity.
And once that identity is in place, your subconscious predicts and reinforces behaviors that match it.
This makes it VERY hard to change a current identity, but not impossible.
Why Change Feels Impossible
Ever try to change something in your life—only to find yourself slipping back into old habits?
I know I have.
That’s not just willpower failing you.
It’s this subconscious prediction of your identity kicking it.
Think about it like an identity thermostat.
Let’s say your subconscious identity is set to 68°F.
Now, let’s say you decide to wake up earlier, start working out, or stop procrastinating.
This is like cranking the temperature up—hitting 80°, 90°, maybe even 100°.
But what happens when you miss a workout? Or take a vacation?
Your brain doesn’t see these as temporary setbacks—it sees them as proof that you are not a 90-degree person.
So it does what thermostats do best—it brings you back down to 68°F.
So you fall back into old habits, patterns & routines.
You fall back to your 68°identity.
This is why change feels so hard.
You’re not just fighting bad habits—you’re fighting your brain’s subconscious prediction of who you are.
How to Break the Cycle: Change the Prediction
You’re probably thinking, “Ok Cody, I get it, it’s hard, how do I change it?”
That’s a great question for an imaginary reader, let’s talk about it!
If your subconscious identity is just a prediction, can you change the prediction?
It turns out—you do this all the time without realizing it.
You act one way at work and another way at home.
You’re a different person at a party than you are in a meeting.
Your brain constantly adjusts your identity based on the context you’re in.
Psychologists call this Multiple Self Theory—you don’t have one fixed identity, you have many versions of yourself that shift depending on the situation.
And if you can shift identities based on context, that means you can consciously create a new identity—one that supports the life you want.
This is at the center of a lot of the work I do with Anxious Achievers and Trauma Survivors.
By helping them change their identity, I’m able to help them heal in a way they never thought they could.
That’s because they couldn’t.
Not as the 1.0 version of themselves, but the 2.0 version we build together absolutely can!
How to Rewire Your Identity w/ Neuroscience
So how do you actually use this to change?
Instead of forcing new behaviors, you start by changing who your brain expects you to be.
Pick a New Identity (Why State Comes First)
Most people try to change their behavior using willpower, following the logic:
Strategy → Story → State
"If I follow this strategy (wake up early, go to the gym, practice confidence), I will eventually create a new story about myself, and then I will finally feel different."
But this almost never works because your state is determined by your identity until you change it!
So, you need to flip the order at first:
State → Story → Strategy
"I am an early riser. I am an athlete. I am confident."
By identifying with these things first, your internal state shifts, which rewrites your story about who you are, and the strategy follows naturally.
Here are some common examples:
Struggling with confidence? Instead of saying "I need to be more confident," try "I am someone who always speaks up."
Want to wake up early? Instead of forcing it with strategies like 10 alarms, step into the State of an early riser: "I am the kind of person who jumps out of bed ready to go."
Trying to build a habit? Don’t just commit to the action—commit to the identity. Instead of "I need to start going to the gym," try "I am someone who never misses a workout."
Your brain doesn’t follow strategy—it follows prediction.
And when the prediction changes, the action becomes effortless.
By becoming the kind of person who does the thing, you naturally do the thing.
This is why identity-first change works. It bypasses willpower and creates an identity-driven shift that your brain locks onto and reinforces.
How to BE
Alright, there’s one last framework that people often get backward when trying to change!
Most people try to change by focusing on actions first:
DO → HAVE → BE
"If I work hard (DO), I’ll get the success (HAVE), and then I’ll feel confident (BE)."
But this is backwards.
Instead, start with identity:
BE → DO → HAVE
"I am the kind of person who follows through (BE), so I naturally take action (DO), and success follows (HAVE)."
This small shift is scientifically proven to be more effective.
Dr. Jonah Berger’s research shows that when people start seeing themselves as the kind of person who does something, they are far more likely to stick with it, as we discussed earlier.
This isn’t just motivational fluff—it’s how your brain wires identity into behavior.
Every time you take an action that aligns with your new identity, your brain gets a hit of dopamine for confirming the prediction—and over time, that identity becomes real.
So, Who Are You?
Your brain is not a prison—it’s a prediction machine.
And if you want to change your life, you don’t need more willpower.
You just need to change the prediction.
So the next time you catch yourself saying, "I’m not that kind of person… [Fill in the Blank]," ask yourself… "Or am I?"
Your brain is waiting for instructions.
Tell it who you are.
Until next time… Live Heroically! 🧠
Supporting Research
Berger, J. (2020). The Catalyst: How to Change Anyone’s Mind. Simon & Schuster.
Hebb, D. O. (1949). The Organization of Behavior: A Neuropsychological Theory. Wiley.
Hawkins, J., & Blakeslee, S. (2004). On Intelligence. Times Books.
Barrett, L. F. (2017). How Emotions Are Made: The Secret Life of the Brain. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt.
Fascinating read!
"I already am what I want to be". Beyond the fact that your thoughts have real power over your reality, this is also true from the perspective that past, present and future might not even exist, so you might really be, physically, already what you want to be.